i miss people

Today is the third day of Winter Conference. This is a conference held by Campus for Christ in Toronto. I have gone to this conference as a student for the past 3 years.

Today I really miss people. I know I would see tons of people at the conference.

Transitioning is very hard.

The thought of being at Winter Conference though is not really something I desire because the thought of being around a bunch of people is overwhelming. And yet, I miss people.

I think I miss good deep conversations with women. I get lots of convos with the husband but I really lack fellowship with other Christian women.

It's hard because we are just far enough from people and I really don't like driving at night and work is tiring and I want to spend lots of time with Andrew.

Also, I feel I am the only one in this stage. I feel kind of isolated.

And there is my heart.

What do you think about my art? I need advice.

Hello voters. I need your help. Do I give this to my sister? (It's for Kelly) I wanted to give her something to add to her decor in her room. She has an accent of purple and probably black. Andrew and I have some wine bottles we haven't brought back and I thought I would make a vase out of one. I bought a thing (i'm not sure what they are called) that you put in vases as accents in a room. It's whispy and has a purple colour in the center. I then used black paint from the dollar store and made this:






Do you like it? Should I try it again? I think I like it but I'm not sure. My thoughts are: I don't want it to be something my sister feels obligated to put in her room because it's a gift and it's too out of place. I'm putting myself out there and need your help.

Fave picture from a visit to my parents house last weekend

Chestnuts and foot in mouth.

I'm standing in line at the grocery store. The lady in front of me is purchasing chestnuts. Without thinking before I speak, I ask this question: "Are you going to roast those on an open fire?" The minute it came out of my mouth I knew it was hilarious to me but could be quite strange to this stranger who has no idea who I am and what sense of humour I have. She responded: "No. My daughter is going to bake them. Have you ever had baked chestnuts? They are very good."

I only know two other people who I could picture asking the question I asked. I think people appreciate my randomness but I'm constantly reflecting on conversations and wondering what people think of me.

On another note, in all seriousness sometimes I don't mean to be joking. A witty comment I made will sometimes catch me off guard. I laugh because what came out of my mouth (which I hadn't processed) was hilarious. I just want people to know that I know that I laugh at my own jokes. I am aware. I think I have made this observation before but I make it again.

That's all for today. :)

Snow- an acrostic poem of words used in the discourse of snowfall

S ometimes
N ever
O ften
W henever

I am clumsy (part II)

My clumsiness has permeated my work life. Today I cut myself with a knife.

If you saw the knife and what I was cutting and HOW (this is the most influential part of why I managed to cut myself) I was cutting you would think it a miracle how little the cut was.

I praise God that I was not seriously hurt. He is gracious with me and my carelessness.

"It's an art really"

"Art is the process or product of deliberately and creatively arranging elements in a way that appeals to the senses or emotions." (Wikipedia search for "art")

Recently I've been excited about the things I can be creative with. We had my sis and her boyfriend over for dinner on Saturday and being the hostess was really fun. As I was making dinner I realized I do enjoy making meals now. You can be creative with it. My sister told me my mother was curious how I was doing with making meals; if you knew my history you would understand my mother's curiosity which could potentially be partnered with concern. I told my sister that I was enjoying it because it's really an art to make meals and present them well. I'd never considered that before. My new job has helped me to understand this about food.

As we were putting up Christmas ornaments I realized that the placement of the ornaments and just putting them up was an art too.

I even realized as I was reflecting with Andrew about how I enjoyed discipling women how understanding each disciple and how they learn is an art. You cannot approach teaching and meeting with each the same. It needs to appeal to their personality and learning style. There is a creative element to that.

It's an art really. I love that I can express my creativity through these things.


P.S Here's some pics of the tree and dinner with Jen and Dave. I made shrimp wrapped with sole fillet, rice and asparagus grilled with almonds and Parmesan cheese (thanks Vaness for the asparagus dealio and for recipes.com where I found the recipe for the seafood wrap)

Dishes, Dishes and MORE DISHES!!! ( the blog entry that could be a few different entries)

Before September washing dishes and other things such as tidying my room, organizing etc. seemed to get in the way of ministry and things that were "important" or so I thought at the time (my roomies can attest to the tidying the room portion).

I think I lack the gift of hospitality which before this new season it didn't bother me. I knew my sister had it in full force and I was glad for her but did not long for it myself. Lately I've been thinking more about this gift you can offer someone else of hospitality. The art of serving and hospitality as a way to lift up my fellow servants in Christ is inviting to me in a way it was not before. I was seriously hopeless in this department before. I think this is why I thought things like dishes and cooking and cleaning got in the way of things before. I did not see the purpose. I am learning.

I digress.

Currently I think I wash dishes about 3 hours of my day. I wash dishes for at least 30 minutes at home and then at work I wash dishes quite often, the most of my coworkers. I am there for approximately 7 hours and each hour seems to have at least a half hour of washing dishes. I don't mind washing dishes only for the fact that it hurts my back a bit when I cave into the comfort of having bad posture while scrubbing. I enjoy that I can use my hands and work hard and not really think that much. Lately I've enjoyed the mind break. It's strange. Washing dishes is like nothing else. You literally can both think deeply and not at all. I can't really articulate. You don't have to think about your work which frees your mind up yet the movement of your hands and the consistency of the work can leave your mind free to not think as well. Am I sounding strange? perhaps.

I will continue.

I would like to read the well known book by famous monk Brother Lawrence entitled "Praciticing the Presence of God." I've heard from many people the portion of his daily life where he talks about how he washes dishes for the glory of God. He is worshipping God while he suds up the dishes. I am intrigued. Now that my days include this task in a large quantity I am interested in reading this book.